Dec 26 2008
A Christmas Carol
Charles Dickens, the noted British author, penned many books designed to enlighten the wealthy city dwellers of the social failings of the country with respect to the working classes. Due to this educational stance, he has attained a great standing in the literature elite, despite his stories being dry, tedious and boring. Even Phil Collins singing jaunty little tunes in the musical version does little to improve the viewers enjoyment. However, few pieces of literature, if any, have been improved by being put to music, by that eras version of Ben Elton. Bah humbug, musicals should simply be banned (especially Gilbert & Sullivan, which makes lawyers, accountants and magistrates believe they are witty, life and soul of the party types, but purely reflect why the professional classes are so despised today).
This, however, is not the subject of my ranting for today. Please, Britain, let’s lay four ghosts to rest, and announce a television moritorium for the rest of time on Dickens short story, ‘A Christmas Carol’. Marley was dead, let it go. Not even a full novel, not enlightening with regard to workhouses, hardly well written, this short, originally contained in a book of short stories, has become the blight of Christmas. In the three festive days (Eve to Boxing Day), British television has selected no less than eight versions of this hogwash. Whilst there is some individuality to The Muppet version, and the modern reworking, set inside a tv company, ‘Scrooged’ with Bill Murray has far more comic affect than the original, the other six are attempts at genuine recreation of the original text. By God, there was even a version starring Kelsey Grammar! Has the man no shame, nor soul. I recall vaguely an episode of ‘Cheers’ where the cast bemoaned the repetitive nature of American Christmas tv, showing Jimmy Stewarts ‘It’s a wonderful life’, and then this talentless ego films the British equivalent.
Of course, the Dickensian blight is not just restricted to the full length films, the musical and the Muppets; almost every tv show has recreated the story in its Christmas episodes. ‘The Simpsons’, ‘Steptoe & Son’, ‘2.4 Children’, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, have thought to themselves, “wouldn;t it be witty, novel and a surprise, if we were to do Dickens for our Christmas Special?” - NO, it would be trite, unimaginative and tedious for the audience.
How horrific to think that at the BBC, ITV, C4 etc, programme makers, commisioners and producers all get paid thousands of pounds each year, and can only come up with Dickens for Christmas. I appreciate that this year there is an irony to this, as Gordon Brown will no doubt be considering re-opening workhouses for those on benefits, Bedlam for the mentally ill, and borstal for the ASBO generation, but please, some imagination, some variety and some new programming.
This lack of quality by television companies probably explains why C4 is going bankruptcy and internet advertising expenditure surpassed that of television for the first time this year. That does not help the public, who are tuning out, watching DVDs, and, binge drinking to oblivion.
What makes me really sad, though, has been the news that Britain has lost one of its finest playwrights of the modern age; Harold Pinter. As a young man at school, I was lucky enough to direct the school, and its sister girls school, Drama Society cast in several plays, including two by that esteemed writer of dialogue. ‘The Caretaker’ and ‘The Dumb Waiter’ were great successes, a pleasure for the cast to perform, easy for props, and wonderful stories. Quite probably, the finest writer of dialogue since Oscar Wilde, this man will truly be missed by all who have been touched by his works. Perhaps, we shall now be fortunate enough to be reminded of his magnificence by the tv companies swamping us unimaginatively with versions of his works, in honour of his passing.
I should also add a quick sad comment at todays news of Eartha Kitts death. She has charmed and entertained for decades, and shall be missed.
